Note that yesterday or even today you have been fall into someone.
Note that you were so much in despair just to know the fact that it is hard for you to be with him.
No matter how close he might be, but still, he was not in your radar.
The chance was not exist because you have removed it from the very first place. Or to be fair, maybe the chance was never ever exist.
Remember that you had suffered a lot to endure the feeling, erase the feeling, and saving the feeling in many different ways.
You do not know what to do.
Then you choose to stay because you say you are fine with the various emotions' of loving.
You made it.
You have experienced how sweet and bitter it is to love and hope for someone.
But in the end, you lost your way.
Gone too far.
Until the day when you have to decide for your life.
You have to choose about keep being silly or be full of conciusness and confidentally step to your next journey.
You eventually said,
"Maybe it is my fate to be with someone I don't love. maybe love is the second thing, the first one is acceptance. and the love itself, is growable as the time flies by."
Wisely you give advice to yourself,
"Forget him and try to get out of your comfort zone. Forget your expectations and try to life the truth".
But sometimes,
the place where you work, the road where you pass by, reminds you to him.
He is just too shining. indeed.
Making him someone else's truly not easy, but doesn't mean can't be done. Just try it. Force yourself.
If he's really destined for you, what else can be obstacle for you to be with him?
If he's not your destiny, then what can you do?
Dear my future self,
It is okay to love someone. To give your best for loving.
But when you need to make it done, then say enough and stop.
Don't live in a past.
it is okay to look back, not to fall within, but to build the new one.
See youself with grace. be happy then.
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