Should We Forgive?

January, 14 2020

Hello again, Ba. Today is a beautiful day. Tuesday with a cloudy sky.
Lately there were so many things caught up by my mind. Most of them is about anger and the term of forgiving.

To begin, I had a friction with a friend in my working place. Actually it was just a little friction. But the friction was continuously happen. Yeah! however we know, as long as we get along with people, we will be able to laugh - have jokes - do silly things together, but we might also experience frictions. No matter what. No matter how hard we try to do things as well and as smooth as possible, the frictions is still unavoidable.

We for sure wouldn't be able to walk without  making any mistake. We wouldn't be able to walk without creating any friction. Therefore the art of realizing mistakes and trying to forgive become so important.

I read an instagram's feed of a friend two days ago. She wrote about a matter that recently I cared about. It was about forgiving.

She said that she has difficulties in forgiving someone whom hurt her. So she asked her husband, "Dear, tell me how to forgive?"
"What is getting in your way to forgive?" Her husband replied.
"Well, then I forgive but I can't forget the pain. Is that mean that I haven't forgive yet?"
"Sometimes there are levels in life, dear. If there are things that don't meet our expectation, let's just start it with forgiving. whatsoever it is, let's just forgive. If we have done with that forgiving thing, we will be able to ask an apologize without need to hardly think who is the right and the wrong, and we don't need to wait people to ask for apologize." her husband said patiently, full of understanding.
After the talking, she then done with herself in case of forgiving. But one day, she felt uncomfortable again because a memory. She came to her husband again, asking for solution
"You have forgiven, but not letting go yet. You just need to focus on your day without think back the disappointing moment. Just think that Allah is wishing to give you a new present by that moment."

It's a reminder for me too. that I just need to focus on my day without remember any bad moment in the past. In case of patience, let's just see our prophet Muhammad pbuh. In case of forgiving, we can see Him too. Long time ago, after Islam won Mecca and Hindun binti Utbah was entering Islam, Rasulullah pbuh still can't put His eyes on Hindun. He didn't want to see Hindun because everytime He see hindun, he remembered a time when Hindun wanted to eat the heart of Hamzah bin Abdul Muththalib (Rasulullah' uncle) in Uhud war. It wasn't mean that Rasulullah didn't forgive Hindun yet, nor let the pain go. He just couldn't forget the case. Just it.

So, it is okay. Truly okay if we can't forget several things easily. We just need to try to forgive as much as we can. Forgiving is not for someone else but for our selves. For our serenity. and our comfort. We have a right to be happy.